Certified
Stages
Practitioner

Certified
Transactional
Analyst

Writing

“We are all born for love. It is the principle of existence and its only end.”
— Benjamin Disreali

Love. It seems a simple thing, but actually it isn’t. Sometimes we find it extremely difficult. Even if we have chosen a life in which we have decided to love others, help others, we are still human, with all those frailties as well as capacities.

So, my message, is very simple, treat each other with kindness…and I know it isn’t easy.

The first step, first and foremost, is that I must treat myself with kindness.

I have to have the capacity to love, not only that which is light in me, but also that which is dark and in the dark. Everything I hide from all of you, my jealousy, my fear, my rage, all those times when I say something passive aggressive, or just plain aggressive. All those parts of me that I don’t like, all those parts I don’t want you to see.

The problem is, if I don’t accept them in myself, I don’t accept, won’t accept them, in others. So the first step is that I must love myself…..all of me…not only that part of me that I think you’ll like…also that part of me that you don’t like. That part of me that invites in you rage, frustration, anxiety…also those parts.

The second step, is to grow that part of me that loves. And again, this isn’t easy, however, loving myself and loving others, is the same work. If you can’t do one, you can’t do the other. Because love everyone, means every part of us, everything that we hide from each other…rage, jealousy, depression, sadness…all those things that as we grow up we are taught to hide. The second step is to love all that is.

Of course, there is in reality no first step or second step.  When we are walking, we have no idea which is the first, or which might be the second step.  We take steps and we move forward.  It is the same with love…love for self and love for others, is the same thing. We are born for love, of love, we are all love.

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